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Renovation
Psychology® Advice for the Home Team Toolbox
Dear Dr. Debi,
We know the kids will like the gifts we got for them this Christmas, but
everyone was modest in their requests. We’d like to do something special, any
ideas?
Signed, Seeking Santa
Dear Ambitious Elves,
Letting people pick their own
present is safe; you won’t risk them not liking or using their gift. Yet you may
feel that your own sense of giving has not been tapped. A true gift needs to
come from somewhere in your heart and touch theirs. How can you do that at home?
You are a resourceful person if you
do home projects. There are many things you can build, modify or fix that are
unique and only will happen if you extend yourself to do them, using your time,
materials, and imagination to bring about what they might enjoy.
There are basically two kinds of
handy gifts. Those you make and give and those that involve the person in the
project. Let’s start with the make-and-give kind.
Thinking of small projects that are
welcome gifts, you can find plenty of nice designs and pictures to get yourself
rolling. Thumbing through your handy magazines or searching online, it is great
to see pictures of the finished projects, as it will give you a design in your
head to carry you into the project. Most articles will also give you exploded
diagrams and handy hints on joinery that almost make the wood jump into place in
your head. You know you will be ready to zip into it easily.
With small pieces of wood you have
already on hand, you can make bins and organizers, a footstool, a computer lap
desk, a remote control organizer, a book shelf, a nick knack rack, a toiletry
cubby for your bathroom, a step stool, a coat rack, and more. Just look around
at clutter in your home, and see what could use a nice organizer to straighten
things out? There you go. Using square cuts and recessing your finish nails, and
then a primer coat, you can have a nice looking piece that will look good with
some accent paint left over from your last room painting.
You can also think of the animals –
a window mount bird feeder is pretty cool and usually best if home made. The
beautiful birds can come and have breakfast with you – what a joy! You can also
make a gift for your dog, too. Perhaps a platform for his food bowl.
And the cats? A scratching post, a
perch or litter box concealer.
And,
if you want to get quite adventurous, you might design a catwalk for them to
explore the perimeter of a room. This can be a shelf that you mount along the
upper walls of a room that inclines like a little ramp up to a perch and a
house. You can even decorate it as an accent to your décor. It is certainly a
fashion risk, so you will want everyone’s consent who may be affected by the
unusual but fun room project.
Another very nice gift can be to
offer a day of handy work to each person in your family. Check your own schedule
to make sure you can do it, and see if you can fit yourself into your kids’ busy
lives for one day each, during their school vacation. You can preview the day
with cocoa a day or two ahead, and then be their contractor for a day, for their
room or other project they need help with. If their room is all set, you can
have them come down to the shop and help them build something they might like to
have or give away.
Yet not all kids are into handy
stuff, so you will need to respond to their talent leanings. You may pick up
where their ability leaves off, to help them achieve a project piece they
desire. Then hand over the paintbrush for the parts they can do. Your adaptation
to their ability and unique talents will be a loving gift in itself that will
connect you afterward as respecting each other. It is like making a mini
team-of-two for a day, to accomplish a little goal that is pleasing to them. Not
only do you connect in adapting to their abilities, but your working toward
their goal for the day is also a gift. That generosity will stick in their mind
in times to come.
Your willingness to consider each
family member’s talents, desires, taste, and priorities as you team up with each
one will be a great gift in itself. Knowing who likes to design, who cuts wood,
who likes to cook, gives you an idea of how to adapt roles your teamwork; this
will acknowledge their ability. Filling in for their gaps will also communicate
acceptance and respect. All of this – adapting yourself to each little
two-person team as you do your mini-team gifts, will help them feel special,
respected, and loved.
Happy Home Team!
Dr. Debi
Dr. Debi Warner is the Founder of
Renovation Psychology® radio & TV host, and author of the
book, Putting the Home Team to Work, available now online at
www.RenovationPsychology.com. Dr. Debi provides advice for greater domestic
harmony to folks who are renovating their home – for True Home Improvement.
This column is offered for enjoyment and enhancement and is not intended to
replace your personal medical care.
Photo by Bob Jenks, St. Johnsbury, Vt.
Dr. Debi has a consultation practice,
from her headquarters in Littleton, NH at the Tannery Marketplace, and visiting
home sites all over the East coast and beyond.
© 2008 Renovation
Psychology® Visit www.RenovationPsychology.com Questions are
welcome.
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